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Living Hell - Volume #1, Issue #14
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Extra Extra
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A.S.S.
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With apologies to Neal Boortz, the radio host who coined the term,
you may be suffering from Anthrax Stress Syndrome if...
o you've started hoarding canned food, bottled water, or
shrink-wrapped toilet paper
o you panic when someone spills sugar, talcum powder, or
confetti
o you flee your local record store after accidentally
browsing the heavy metal titles (see: Anthrax, the
band)
o you're taking antibiotics, just in case
o you're *prescribing* antibiotics, just in case
o cold? Flu? Hay-fever? Two words: Emergency room
o you dial 911 at skyward sight of U.S. Army Golden
Knights parachute team spraying red fog (true story)
o you faint upon hearing one or more of the following:
"spore"
"spores"
"spore count"
"nasal swab"
"Cipro"
"Daschle"
"bio-terror"
"bio-warfare"
"epidemiologist"
"skin lesion"
"mail room"
"letter carrier"
"white powder"
"inhalation form"
"assistant to Dan Rather"
Copyright 2001 by Michael J. Legeros
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