Small Soldiers (1998)

SMALL SOLDIERS sucks.  A super-nifty premise-- action figures that 
come to life-- is sabotaged by bland casting, weak characters, and 
a story that's dull, dull, dull.  (Even the set-up is a botch.  Did 
they have to explain *everything* beforehand?)  Stan Winston's ama-
zing effects energize the explosive finale, but be prepared for an 
excruciatingly slow first hour.  (I can't say don't walk out, but 
if you do, you'll miss the surreal sight of Kirsten Dunst being at-
tacked by Barbie dolls, as well as one whopper of a hearty Spice 
Girls joke.)  Instantly forgettable, but you're kids'll think it's 
the best movie of the summer.  That is, next to DR. DOLITTLE.  With 
the voices of Tommy Lee Jones, Frank Langella, and the members of 
Spinal Tap, among other surprise speakers.  Joe Dante (GREMLINS) 
directs.  (Rated "PG-13"/108 min.)

Grade: D+

Copyright 1998 Michael J. Legeros
Movie Hell is a trademark of Michael J. Legeros

Originally posted to triangle.movies in MOVIE HELL: July 12, 1998

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