Blast From the Past (1999)

I hereby pronounce BLAST FROM THE PAST as the year's first unwatch-
able movie.  The absolute gem of a premise-- Brendan Fraser as boy 
raised in bomb shelter who emerges in present day to fall in love 
with Alicia Silverstone-- is ruined by a foul first half-hour that 
all-too-painfully details the how's of how they got there.  The 
tone jumps around like a bear with its ass on fire, plot devices 
literally fall out of the sky, parents Christopher Walken and Sissy 
Spacek's acting deteriorates as rapidly as their make-up, and the 
passage of time above-ground is shown by a stupid, stupid, stupid 
subplot involving a mom-and-son malt shop-turned-disco-turned-biker 
bar.  I left at the 25-minute mark, before Brendan went top-side, 
but what the Hell do I know?  Everyone else at tonight's packed 
sneak-screening laughed when they should, including the blonde 
bitch on our row who nearly came to blows with another patron over 
saved seats.  You got class, lady.  Directed by Hugh Wilson, whose 
last radioactive bomb was the Nicholas Cage-Shirley MacLaine room-
clearer GUARDING TESS.  And, speaking of suck-fests, Genna Davis' 
star un-maker Renny Harlin is listed as a producer.  (Rated some-
thing)

Grade: W/O

Copyright 1999 Michael J. Legeros
Movie Hell is a trademark of Michael J. Legeros

Originally posted to triangle.movies as MOVIE HELL: It Burns! It Burns!